My Kawaii Revolution: On Strength

Question: Which one person, out of this list, would I consider my role model?

A. Temple Grandin

B. Misako Aoki

C. Edward Abbey

D. Laura Shigihara

The correct answer is B-Misako Aoki. Misako Aoki is a nurse and a lolita fashion model. She is presumably able-bodied and neurotypical. (Misako does not discuss about her disability status with the Internet.) As far as temperament, I would say she is an ESFJ because she practically radiates Fe and Si.  

I bet most of you were taken aback by my choice. Misako Aoki does not fit the typical disability role model mold, but she has heavily influenced not only the way I advocate, but the way I choose my coping methods. Misako unabashedly embraces her style and expresses it wholeheartedly. Others may find her weird or frivolous because she dresses in lolita fashion, but there is nothing frivolous about loving yourself. In a society where conformity is valued, Misako, who technically fits the definition of "normal", chooses to defy it with frills. She had an "advantage" in society and discarded it in favor of belonging to her own community. Can we, who are forced out of the norm by birth, not find our strength in the same?

For those of you who don't know, lolita is a Japanese street fashion that draws inspiration from the Victorian and Rococo periods as well as the Japanese kawaii "cute" esthetic. Lolita fashion emphasizes modesty, innocence, youthfulness, quality, and taste; the fashion emerged as a rebellion against over-sexualization of women in fashion. It has NOTHING to do with the Western definition of lolita, so do NOT trust your computer's built-in dictionary for this one. The fashion's main focus is dressing for one's self rather than for others. Lolita does more, however, than cover the body. It shows the mind. 

Misako Aoki influenced my approach to being autistic more than other autistic people. She is a genuinely kind, gracious, and humorous person and that, in itself, is worth emulating. I am proud to say that Misako Aoki is my role model. Never trenchant in her ways, Misako asserts and expresses herself by wearing frilly dresses and treating other people kindly. She does not need to conform to conventional images of strength in order to be strong. I surround myself with cute and elegant images simply because they make me happy. Misako Aoki taught me to embrace this part of myself.

Being cute does not mean that I am not powerless. Keep in mind that kawaii is an aesthetic, not an existence, although some people do adopt a kawaii lifestyle. I do not need to act or dress a certain way in order to indicate that I am a strong person. The kawaii esthetic makes me feel good about myself and who I am and many others would agree. If that is not a valid enough reason for you to "get" the kawaii esthetic, I don't know what will be.

If you find this esthetic stifling, then don't use it. However, I personally find it very empowering. The nature of lolita and the kawaii esthetic in general is best described as "intensely gentle." In small doses, kawaii elements are non-confrontational. In large amounts, however, they are very conspicuous and inspire admiration, envy, and/or hatred depending on your audience. The kawaii esthetic is not for everyone and I can respect that. However, it is for me. It suits me. If I need to act and dress a certain way to be strong, then that's not true strength at all.